I Set a Boundary For Thanksgiving - Here's How it Went....

Can you believe it's already the holiday season?!

The holidays are supposed to be a time of joy, but for many recovering perfectionists and people pleasers, they can feel like a minefield. The pressure to be everywhere, do everything, and make everything perfect can quickly turn what should be a season of rest into a season of stress. And let’s not forget the guilt that creeps in when we feel like we’re not doing enough for everyone else.

This is where trusting yourself really matters.

Instead of saying “yes” to every holiday gathering or overcommitting to tasks that will drain your energy, take a step back and check in with yourself. What do you need this holiday season? What’s going to nourish your soul rather than deplete it? You have the right to prioritize your own well-being without the guilt.

Trusting yourself in these moments means setting boundaries that might disappoint others, but will ultimately protect your peace. It means recognizing that you can still love and care for others without losing yourself in the process. You can’t pour from an empty cup, and the holidays don’t have to be about doing it all.

One way to approach this is by giving yourself permission to say “no” to what doesn’t feel right, and “yes” to what feels nourishing. It’s okay to skip that holiday party you don’t enjoy. It’s okay to take a break from social media if it feels overwhelming. You deserve to have a holiday season that fills you up, rather than drains you.

For my family, we usually host Thanksgiving for both my and my husband's families in Arroyo Grande, CA. It is a LOT of work but it usually brings me so much joy. This year will be my first Thanksgiving since my mom passed away. The thought of doing "business as usual" this Thanksgiving without her didn't sit well with me. With my husband's encouragement, we told his family we would be celebrating on our own this year. I was SO scared of how they would respond. If I don't cook for them, then who would? To my surprise, my mother in law responded with, "Sweetie that is a lovely idea!". WHAT?! 😳 My jaw almost dropped in shock! It was a good lesson for me that boundaries aren't always as hard to implement as we think. Let’s give our loved ones the benefit of the doubt to handle our boundaries.

Tip of the Day: Today, pick one holiday commitment you’re feeling unsure about, and give yourself permission to say no. Practice self-compassion by acknowledging that it’s a choice made out of love for yourself.

Journal Prompt: What holiday traditions or events tend to cause me stress or guilt? How can I set boundaries to protect my peace this season?

You are worthy of a peaceful, joyful holiday season. Trust yourself to create that.

With love and encouragement,

Trinity